Thursday, July 3, 2014

Revenge of the Black Nerds

This is an old article republished.

Do you know who is the most despised person in the black community? Is it the drug dealer? Is it the man who has a dozen babies with a dozen different women? Is it the gang banger, who lives off women and whips them worse than the LAPD? No, the most reviled figure in the black community is the black nerd!

Yes, that skinny black kid, who is bad at sports, wears glasses and loves computers gets absolutely no respect. You would have thought that these other losers, who cause untold damage to the black community, would be outcasts but go to any college campus or high school and you will see young black women flocking to gangbangers, dope slingers and men who have no idea how to use a condom. 

I know this sounds hard to believe, but take it from my own first-hand experience, it's absolutely true. I should know, I am a former nerd and proud of it. I have all the characteristics of a nerd. Good in school, check; loves sci-fi, check; loves computers, check; loves comic books, check. Those four characteristics are good enough to give you a lifetime membership in the nerd fraternity. 

I have always had nerdish tendencies, but in college I was able to combine those with skills that made me socially acceptable. I wore  fashionable clothes (I even pierced my ears), I went to nightclubs and parties and I wasn't afraid to talk to the opposite sex. But I never forgot my nerdy beginnings or my nerdy friends. Yes, I got invited to the frat parties and went clubbing, but I always felt more comfortable with the guys (and girls) who were interested in politics and science fiction. 

Still, being able to flit between the cool kids and the nerds gave me an insight into what was popular on campus. You would think the ambitious, smart kid, who was going to grad school, would more be attractive to bright, black coeds. Think again. From my experience, even the sharpest and most sophisticated black sorority girls ended up paired with knuckle-dragging jocks, who could barely string together an intelligent sentence. (A lot of these jocks, should never have been in college and were only there because of their prowess on the basketball court or football field.)

Looking back, this kind of behavior is not surprising. College-age women are still going through the rebellious stage, where dangerous bad boys, and men their parents disapprove are exciting. They like the danger, unpredictability, and the fact these guys also need to be house trained. Some women also think that bad boys are more likely to know their way around a woman's body, than nerds who's have only seen naked woman on a flat screen. Women of other races go through their bad boy stage, but eventually as they enter the real world, they seem to overcome their bad-boy fixation and start looking for ambitious, professional men, who have the same goals as them. 

White nerds are also shunned, but not as badly as black nerds. White nerds find nerdy girls who also dig computers and "Star Trek," and eventually pair off. Some non-black women, who were anti nerd in college, eventually wise up and realize that all the hard work Poindexter did in college is eventually going to pay off. White nerds like Steve Jobs and Bill Gates are even celebrated in pop culture, but until the recent advent of President Barack Obama, the only role model black nerds had was Steve Urkel! (Even Obama faced rejection from the black community at first who thought that he wasn't "down" enough. Although no one has ever questioned the black credentials of camera-chasers like Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton.)

Unfortunately, it seems that in the black community, women have different expectations. Many young women are attracted to men who project power, whether its financial or physical. I have some advice for these young ladies. The gang banger with the bulging muscles and corn rows might have a lot of physical strength, but he is on a fast track to jail and you are destined for a life of speaking to him through a glass screen on weekends. The drug dealer may have plenty cash, but he is also destined to end up in the same place as the gang banger. And as for the jock, if he makes it to the pros, he will drop you faster than the way Usher ditched his wife. And even if you do succeed in marrying him be prepared for a life of paternity suits, mistresses and constant road trips.

The jocks who don't make it to the pros, often haven't studied hard enough to get a decent education, so when they get out college their prospects are pretty bleak. The popularity of gangsta rap has only worsened the situation for black nerds. Hardcore rap has turned the likes of 50 Cent and Lil Wayne into sex symbols, and they are more likely to be considered attractive, than a black intellectual.  I saw this issue brought up in a "Tyra" show about dating issues in the black community. When asked what she was looking for in a man, one sista said she was looking for a college-educated black man, but with P. Diddy's swagger. One of the male panelists on the show said, "So your looking for Tupac with an MBA?" If she finds him, he will probably be riding a unicorn, smoking a blunt and reading a copy of the Wall Street Journal -- he doesn't freaking exist!

It seems that some sisters would rather date a drug dealer, than a struggle black college nerd. Believe me, I saw evidence of this when I was in college. I knew a sister in college who was active in student government and very ambitious. She ended up getting pregnant by a drug dealer. Essence magazine once did a story about why women prefer dating thugs over "corporate brothers." One woman said she thought that thugs were would be able to protect her physically. 

The black nerds eventually have their revenge, much the way I did.  After graduation, the black nerd usually ends up working in his chosen profession. And armed with a nice suit, a toned gym body, and a cool ride, he suddenly becomes attractive. The same women who wouldn't spit on him in college suddenly find him attractive. 

Unfortunately, by then the black nerd has tired of waiting for sisters to pull their heads out of their asses. He has started to look around and weigh his options. He might not be "edgy" enough for sisters, but there are plenty of smart white, Asian and Latino women who enjoy his company. The single, college educated black men is a precious commodity and there are a lot of bidders for his services. If you don't believe me check out how many non-black women are on sites such as Blackpeoplemeet.com looking for partners. 

To the black nerds who are having a rough time now hold on, time is a great equalizer. In about five years time, the same women who rejected you in college will be begging for your number. And to the sisters who complain about the lack of decent black men, I suggest you start looking at nerds and other bookish guys. They are like iPhones, get them early or your out of luck. 


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